01 December 2009

Affirmative Defense for Mountain Murders

So, I'm having a discussion with another attorney today and he was trying to explain how mountain folk feel about murder. As he explained it there is a two part affirmative defense which doesn't exist in other parts of the Commonwealth:
(1) That sonuvab!tch needed to get kilt, and
(2) I was the right person to do it.
We discussed for a while whether this is a perfect defense and came to the conclusion that it is in some cases, but not in others. It seems to depend on how much a sonuvab!cth he is and whether he is either (a) on your land, or (b) with your wife.


Mark Bennett said...

Who knew that the Virginia mountains were populated by Texans?!?

Joel Rosenberg said...

Mark: pretty much all Minnesotans. From our POV, you folks are all the same. (As opposed to West Virginians, where everything's, err, relative.)