I ain't trying to go to prison.

This is LOL funny. I have a variation of that conversation at least once a week, if not far more often. The main difference is that my clients insist on calling it "this little charge", as in

Client: "I can't go to prison for 20 years on this little charge."

Me: You're accused of having stolen something worth more than $200. That's a grand larceny and carries a maximum penalty of 20 years. The judge could sentence you to that, but (speaking quickly so Client cannot interrupt) I've never seen anyone get more than 5 years and your sentencing reccomendation is for 3 months. That's your most likely sentence.

Client: I ain't doing three months on this little charge.

lv Skelly