CrimLaw

A man who trains British legal professionals explains why he thinks they are idiots

"Take the would-be barrister who questioned me, a burglary victim, in court to identify the burglar whom I had seen.

'It was dark, wasn't it?' 'No, it was light.'

She took a moment to consider. 'But apart from the light. It was dark?'

. . .

One was questioning me about why I hadn't parked outside my house.

'There were no spaces,' I explained reasonably.

'I put it to you that you are lying,' asserted my tormentor, producing a photograph. 'Look at this picture. It clearly shows your house with spaces outside.'

'But that was taken on another day,' I replied. The performance came to an abrupt end.

. . .

There was sometimes a scary lack of awareness of the basic facts of life. I was the husband in a domestic dispute and my barrister was investigating my case.

'You say you haven't had sexual relations with your wife for a year and yet you have a ten-month-old child?'

I admitted this was true.

'Well, I fail to see how that's possible.'